The Bachelor Recap

Before I start, I would just like to say that I stayed up past 1am to watch The Bachelor for this recap. If that doesn't spell dedication, then I don't know what does. Plus, we're moving floors tomorrow in our office and my desk is in shambles. The unorganization is killing my thought process. Enough of the excuses, here's the recap!

So we're down to the final three in the land of the Bachelor. Jason whisked the girls away to New Zealand for a romantic getaway coupled with overnight dates. We welcomed a little change in scenery because the recession has had things moving a little slow this season. The first date this week went to Jillian. They embarked on a helicopter tour, followed by a picnic on the edge of a cliff (thank you ABC intern). She was over the moon for this completely awesome date. However, we noticed that Jason looked a little reluctant as she opened up and talked about wanting to marry her best friend with the desire of growing old together. I personally thought that this looked like the most enjoyable date, but probably because I think that Jillian is so natural. Everything that they do together seems so normal and comfortable, but clearly Jason was having reservations about them being merely friends with nothing more passionate. Insert: the hot tub scene. I mean, what in the world? First of all, I have faithfully watched every season of The Bachelor for years now and I can tell you that they have never shown so much action at length. Let's just say that it was WAY too much and affirms any suspicions that one might have as to what they actually do in the fantasy suite. And in complete defense of Jillian, this amount of affection would confuse any girl...more on that later.

Molly was up next for the worst of the three dates. Not only was it raining the whole time but he also planned for them to go bungee jumping. My fear of heights had me from hello on this one and I didn't even enjoy watching it. You know that all she wanted to do was look pretty and put her best foot forward...the next thing she knew she was jumping off a bridge with frizzy hair. No thank you. I think that going on a television show to find love proves that you can handle the pressure, but call me old-fashioned. They moved on from the bungee over to have coffee and breakfast together. Molly pulled out a list of twenty questions to ask Jason for the sake of knowing just "regular" things about him. What struck me was the question, "if your house was burning down, what would you grab first?" Me, being the interactive spectator that I am, blurted out, "Ty." Only for Jason to answer, "my old school Air Jordans." Wait a second. You mean to tell me that out of all of your prized possessions, both living and sentimental, that your old sneakers would be spared from the wreckage?! For Ty's sake, we're going to pray that there's no Seattle blaze...

The last date was for Melissa. My how the mighty have fallen in our eyes, Melissa just isn't cutting it these days. The whining, the sad eyes, the puckered bottom lip...it's just getting to be too much. Although we're not much for Melissa, Jason is. The attraction for him is so apparent, that it makes it hard for us to take the other relationships seriously. Melissa and Jason took a boat ride around the coast and then ventured back to a resort for another round in the hot tub. Thankfully round 2 was a lot more PG! They went round-and-round about Melissa's family (or lack thereof) and she explained to him that they would have loved him and that she is disappointed that they were not a part of this process. She obviously has feelings for Jason and expressed them very clearly on their evening date. Just like the two before her, she said that she was in love with Jason and that she thought he should know. Due to the fact that he can't express his feelings, he just made out with her. Every year I think that there is something sick and wrong with the fact that these girls have to do this. Must they really have to be so vulnerable? The whole setting is just so unnatural, the multiple seating arrangements, the bubble baths, the abundance of wine...

Y'all...am I over this?!

Ugh, here's the recap:

Molly - Molly was a trooper this week. Without a doubt, she was dealt the roughest hand and persevered. I couldn't help but think that I'd be the crazy girl with poofy Diana Ross hair literally crying because I had to wimp out of bungee jumping due to hyperventilation. (Take two seconds to actually picture that...insane.) Anyway, Jason has consistently been on board with Molly. Status: rose.

Jillian - It goes without saying that we're big fans of Jillian. Last week I stated that she was statistically the best match for Jason but now I feel like I can't really make that judgement call anymore. I will, however, admit when I am wrong and I clearly was off-base on this one. She seems like someone that has a grasp on what she's looking for and I'm completely confident that she'll find it. And for whatever it's worth, we loved that dressed that she got dumped in...at least she went out in style. Status: no rose.

Melissa - Well Melissa looked like a saloon girl at the rose ceremony this week. I just don't even know where you begin to purchase an outfit like that. She whimpered her way to the rose this week and something tells me that there's a lot more in store for her. Status: rose.

**This just in. Y'all...I have heard a spoiler so big that I don't even know what to do with myself. For the sake of accuracy, I am not going to share it because it's still just speculation, but let's just say it's big. I mean, b-i-g. I hate to be so dramatic but that's what I do. I can say that, without a shadow of a doubt, Chris Harrison has finally gotten it right, "the most dramatic rose ceremony yet" is completely justified with this twist. So next week we have the "Women Tell All" (lame) but that just means that it brings us even closer to the finale!

Stay tuned.